marker on
Maison de hautes couleurs paper
For about a week now I’ve had the urge to sort. That isn’t my norm – I normally
like to pretend that somehow the mess in my studio, and all over the house will
magically just go away. But on the rare occasions when I get the urge to look at
some of what I've accumulated, I go for it, knowing the urge could vanish any
second.
This sketch of a tired me – a self portrait makes me happy. I can see that I am
dressed up because there’s jewellery at my neck. An artist's regular work clothes
tend to be ripped, paint splattered sweaters and jeans. No jewels. Nothing that
could get harmed by paint, or water, or any other substance in the studio.
So what do I mean that it starts with you and me? I mean we have to take charge
of our moods. In the past week I've been noticing the light. Steven and I are
getting to the lake, even to hear the sound of water if the sun has already set, after
his workday. We're listening to music, dancing when the mood hits us, and trying
to enjoy everything we can enjoy in the moment.
That’s what it means it starts with me and you. If I decide that I can be happy, and
there is anything at all to be happy about, then it is time to take hold of my life. If
I can share anything that gives me joy with you, believe me I will. I hope you like
this tired portrait. I do because I know it means that I was either teaching, or had
just been to an opening. And as tired as I sometimes get with my once a week night
class, I enjoy it so much, and it makes me happy. I can’t wait until I can see my
students in person again.
And as for the fatigue that comes after a great exhibition reception, with people
drinking champagne and talking about the work -- bring it on! (Not yet -- when
it's safe.)
Have a dreaming of someday day
2 comments:
Love your portrait of self and the markmaking. It is so honest. And you are so right about taking charge of one's mood. It is easy to sink into a feeling of hopelessness, but just takes putting a smile on to change it. Thank you.
Thank you Evelyn,
I've been waking up and saying, "This is the happiest day of my
life!" And just that thought has had a profound effect.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO Barbara
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